Relationship Counseling

Counseling & Psychotherapy in SLO / the Central Coast / California

Standard couples counseling can be a positive experience and can do a lot to help, but over the years I've found that it's far more productive if each member of the couple is just going to their own individual therapy.  A healthy couple is the natural outcome of two healthy individuals coming together.  It's not so much about being a healthy couple as it is about being two healthy people.  Two healthy people will have a healthy relationship.  

Specifically, I can help when you need guidance with your relationship, but your partner doesn't want to come to counseling or doesn't see the need.  There's still hope.  You actually can transform any relationship by *you* being different.  In a nutshell, this is actually the secret.  It's a great option to come in on your own for relationship counseling.  

Also, many people I meet with are single and lonely and are seeking a relationship, but haven't been able to find a good relationship with the right person.  Whether you are single and seeking how best to find the partner you hope for, or you're in a relationship that's really challenging you, individual counseling can help a great deal with both of these issues.

You might be feeling very angry and disappointed in your partner, and you've tried to talk to him or her, with no results.  Your partner might be dealing with some serious mental health issues of their own, but they aren't working on themselves, and you're just left to deal with it.  Or you might be single and feeling very lonely, not knowing where a good partner can be found anymore.  I'm here to help.  I am an experienced therapist who specializes in helping people dealing with relationship issues.  My office is located in San Luis Obispo (SLO), and I'm accessible across the Central Coast.

If you're already in a relationship, but you feel like you're in it alone, there is much that still can be done.  It's true, it takes two healthy individuals to make a healthy couple; but the good news is, the stronger and wiser and more skilled any one member of the couple becomes, the more it will feed back into the relationship as a whole.  As you communicate better, set better boundaries, understand and express your feelings and needs more strongly and clearly, your partner will inevitably have to deal with the new you. 

Coming on your own to treatment, you can learn how to find and stay in your own grounded and calm emotional center; you can learn to respond to your partner instead of reacting; you can learn how to communicate with your partner in a healthy and productive way; and you can learn how to gently but firmly, and persistently, share your needs. 

Over time, your partner will have to respond to this new person they're dealing with.  Either they will respond in a healthy and positive way, or they will double-down on the old dysfunctions and try to pull you back in.  Either way, you will be gaining the clarity you need to know how to go forward.

I have seen very positive outcomes of this process many times over the years, and so I want to hold out the hope and opportunity for anyone who wants specific help for their relationship, but who has a partner who can't or won't come into the therapy process with you. 

Please feel free to write or call me for more information on how relationship counseling can help you; I would be happy to talk with you about your situation, and how you might go forward.

I am able to meet with local clients in person, but I continue to see many clients by video as well.  Let me know what you prefer and we can talk about our options.  In addition, I can see clients from any part of California by video.  Please feel free to contact me with any questions you might have about how I can be of help by calling 805-868-0767.  Erik

My Areas of Expertise - please click on the links below:

• Depression Counseling
• Anxiety & Stress Counseling
• Trauma & PTSD Therapy
• Professionals/ Life Coaching
• Midlife Crisis Counseling
• Relationship Counseling
• Faith & Spirituality

You can overcome depression, defeat anxiety, and build healthy, strong relationships.  Live from the core of your True Self.  Experience clarity, direction, and fulfillment of your potential.